Mr. Mouse on the lam

Before trying to go home I decided to give Mrs. Annette a phone call. This turned out to be of vital importance, as the authorities are currently looking for me with an actual warrant, the charges being abuse of illegal substances, damaging agricultural property and animal cruelty.  Apparently that poor buffalo is suffering from an infected ear and posttraumatic stress disorder. Well, there you are, this is what happens when people do not have even the least bit of humor. Whole thing probably went right over their head. I mean, sure, I´ll be the first to admit that at times I can be prone to a certain degree of exaggeration, even overly indulgent behavior.  I might be a bit of an outlaw, but I´m most certainly not a felon.  Well, the way things are now I´m holed up at the Molina’s Hotel. Fortunately I always carry an emergency reserve of traveler checks with me, which I cashed in right after talking to Mrs. Annette. I also still have my credit card, but I´m afraid the authorities might be able to trace that. And I certainly can´t use it at the hotel, since I´m known around here as the mildly eccentric Mr. Mouse. To make things worse I watched a documentary on National Geographic TV about people getting jailed abroad, and this week´s feature was about Cambodia. Jeez, that guy barely made it out of that place alive! He was stabbed on his first day in there, and even though a good friend managed to bribe the guards after just 3 days and then smuggle him across the border he is still recovering from the trauma. So, just turning myself in does not seem to be a sensible option at this time. I was thinking of making a break for the temple of refuge at Wat Phnom, where anybody can seek refuge and reportedly is safe from any kind of prosecution, always provided he vows to live the life of a Buddhist monk. And this is where it all comes down again. I´ll prefer life in prison over life in a monastery any time. Yes, the outlook is rather dire at the moment. Mrs. Annette is incommunicado since my last call. Apparently she´s had it with my shenanigans. It seems to me that someone in Germany put her up to this, so, thanks a lot for your kind support. And in case you didn´t notice, I´m being cynical here. On the plus side I have to say that I´ve always lived life to the max, and this kind of ending does not really come as much of a surprise to me. There might even be a certain kind of poetic justice here, but that´s for the afterworld to decide. Meanwhile, I´m spending my days watching TV, taking hot baths and drinking Angkor beer. Last night when I couldn´t sleep I went downstairs and shared some cheap Mekong red-eye with the night-clerk, who obviously is a souse.

Yes. It´s serious this time. And I honestly have no idea how to get myself out of this jam. 

Hot enough for ya?